What Matters to Them

I was looking at picture of my 3 year old and started to cry. The picture of him was so simple and caring yet spoke volumes to me in a split second. To my 3 year old, it doesn't matter how many degrees I have (or if I have any at all). It doesn't matter to him if I am a cover girl's beauty or a prized writer. To him all that matters is that I am there for him. He asks me, "Mommy, do you see me?" or "Mommy, are you proud of me?" To him, the only thing that matters to him is that I show up. All the striving we do is really for us. All our pursuit is for them (we tell ourselves, society tells us) so that they can have food and clothes and then get into the best colleges and so forth. But really, for them (at any age) all they really want is for all of you to see all of them.

So this is not an excuse to not be a provider for your children and pursue a career. But what is should say to you is that when we are in all our pursuit of success and happiness, we must remember that there has to be a level of simplicity when it comes to our children. They want a warm body to play their latest pretend game because truthfully, while he has the Nintendo DS, he is just as happy playing with the cardboard box and making it a car. Listen to the hearts of your child, listen to her eyes. She is telling you what she really wants, or more importantly, what she needs.

From one mommy to another,
*Aurellia*

To Our Babies

I've mentioned in various social media forums that a good sister-friend of mine is working on a manuscript for mothers. This book is phenomenal in concept and I know it is going to be even more amazing. It is going to be a work about what we as mother's need to make sure we tell our daughters. (She is also penning one for our sons too, so don't feel left out mommy's of boys.)

My sister-friend and I both have similar stories in that we feel there are aspects of life and growing up that our mother's didn't tell us about and that, as we are older, we wished they would have told us. Don't get me wrong--we are NOT blaming our mother's for the oops! that we have done. By far. We do, however, (after many failed friendships, relationships, therapy sessions, etc) recognize that there were essentials to being a woman that only a mother could have told us.

Some of our mother's are amazing. Some of our mother's are not so amazing. Regardless of which category your own mama falls in, you can have the opportunity to be an amazing mother. Not a perfect one but an amazing one.

I can't wait to read the first chapter. There are lessons I wish I'd known but am excited to pass them on to my children.

*Aurellia*
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An Excerpt from Lisa Tate-Hamilton's book, Lessons to Our Daughters:

I can’t protect you from everything, but Mommy looks for a teaching opportunity in every situation. One day I hope to look back at your journey and be able to measure your growth and fruits of my labor. And even then, I will still be your mommy, working tirelessly to make your life easier.

I always say:

"Nobody loves you like I love you,” because you are a mirror of me. You are the legacy I leave in this life.

To stay connected to Lisa, read her Examiner articles at http://www.examiner.com/motherhood-in-mesa/lisa-tate-hamilton.