Soccer

Hi Mommies. Today is Thursday. This means that it is Soccer Practice. I wish I could say that I was more excited than I am but I have to be completely honest: I am not excited one bit. Why am I not excited to participate in the fun of my preschooler playing in his first sport? Because he DOESN'T. He just stands there on the field sulking. I am completely drained by the end of the practice from all of my anxiety.

I know, I am putting way too much on it. But really, I have all sorts of feelings running through my body. First off, I am thinking that he is miserable and I have him out there participating in something that I want him to do. But then I remind myself that HE wanted to play soccer. Second, I am feeling sad because I notice that all of the other 4 and 5-year-olds seem to know everyone and he doesn't know a single kid. Then I realize that he doesn't have my exuberant personality when it comes to being social and have to come to terms with that. Third, I am upset because after my long day of very emotionally draining work and a hot commute ride home, I am sitting outside for another hour watching my son stand or walk during SOCCER (the game where everyone runs most of the time!

I know you want to take me and probably shake me a little and tell me to get a grip. I know. I am overreacting but I just don't understand. He wanted to play and he stands there. He says it is because I am there watching him. Oh give me a break. He says it is because Coach told him that one person will run and the other person will walk. Oh come on. Really? LOL.

And then after I am done projecting my expectations of enjoyment and fulfillment on him, I am quiet within to realize that he IS 4 years old and this IS a new "thing" and environment for him. He is NOT me. He has rhythm all his own and I have to allow him to flourish and blossom on his own at his own pace. Now, if this same scenario happens next year, there will be NO MORE SOCCER!

Blessings,
Aurellia